How to Be the Best Instagram HusbandDavid Burgundy | 07 Mar 2018
You only have to walk down the street to witness the world living their lives through a lens. No meal is complete, no celebration celebrated to the full, no casual walk in the park walked, if there isn’t a photo loaded onto social media. Behind every perfect upload is a husband (or friend, or partner in crime) desperately trying to avoid divorce, and cling to his or her sanity at the same time. Welcome the Insta ‘husband’ (or other relevant title!).
We understand the desperation Instahusband’s must feel when it comes to ensuring the pic is perfect. You’ve seen it. There he stands, lines up his shot, takes the photo, and then presents it for inspection only to be told to take another one. Like a male bird trying desperately to get his mate to okay the nest he has built, only to have her pull it apart because. It. Is. Just. Is. Not. Perfect!
In the interest of relationships everywhere, here are some tips to keep you out of divorce court, or possibly jail.
Stay calm, breathe. Do not allow the pressure to get to you. Decide what you are trying to portray and then choose what is going to help you get that shot. Plus, significant others can smell fear and fear is weakness.
Be Prepared to Embarrass Yourself, Repeatedly
The angle from which you take your picture will make an enormous difference in the outcome of the shot. By far the most flattering photos of people are taken from slightly above. This is going to make your subject look slimmer and more proportioned. Taking a photo from below could make your subject’s head look too small for their body, and who wants people looking up their nostrils?
Sometimes getting these perfect angles are going to require the type of contortionist moves that you thought only five-year-old prodigy gymnasts were capable of. Good luck and get those muscle relaxers ready.
Choose Your Time of Day
For the sake of your very survival no Instahusband wants to present a photo that highlights every imperfection. No photo, no matter how good the composition will shine online if the lighting is bad. So, unless you are carting around a professional rig, choose your lighting wisely and stay away from the flash. The golden hour is always a good idea, but if not, work with angles, or work with photo editing apps to get the right light!
Use Your Eyes Before You Shoot
We can see you rolling your eyes at the stupidity of that statement, but bear with us. All too often the act of taking the photo supersedes the act of finding the composition.
What you are trying to do is catch on camera what it is that your eyes see, or what your significant other imagines you to be seeing. So instead of taking 50 snaps and hoping one is good enough. To preserve your sanity and memory card, take some time to look at your subject and surroundings, frame the photo with your eyes and only then press the shoot button.
The chances are if you have been roped into being the impromptu photographer your subject is calling the shots and keeping you on your toes. As every good, even great, Instahusband knows sometimes it’s the unplanned pictures that can secure the most likes. So, pay attention and watch out for the moments where you can snap a perfect story. If your SO is playing mobile casino games, snap away until the thrill of a big win lights up their face. If they are enjoying a particularly delicious dish, snap them as they take the first bite. A snap that really gets the emotion of a moment and makes your SO look amazing is always a winner.
Take Advantage of The Pre-programmed Modes
The programmed modes are there because the manufacturers know that you are not a professional, so use them to help hide your photographer shortcomings.
- Burst mode for super sharp action shots.
- Portrait mode for blurred backgrounds to make your subject really pop
- Apps that blur water and moving objects to simulate a slow shutter speed.
Don’t be scared, try them, but maybe start by practicing on the dog.
Practice, practice, practice. And maybe hide some hard liquor in your bag just in case murderous thoughts start to take root in your imagination.